Tips for Living Bright 5.23: BE FREE OF GUILT
Earlier, I wrote about “writing about what you need to hear” and today, that is exactly what I am doing.
It’s only Monday and I’m already feeling behind the eight-ball and, therefore, totally guilty.
I know that I am not alone. Life can be a tornado.
Running from point A to point B, being late, not getting everything done, letting people down. Lately, I feel as if I am immersed in a game of Frogger, trying to cross a busy street, swatting at flies, and getting nowhere.
And the GUILT is real, it’s palpable. And it needs to stop.
Guilt should have no place in our life. It is not productive. In fact, it’s counterproductive.
So, how do we prevent guilt from taking hold?
Take note of what is causing the guilt.
Is the guilt a result of something you can or cannot control? If it’s outside of your control — such as your PERCEPTION of someone’s opinion of you — then release that guilt. Take things one step at a time. Do what you can and let go of those variables that are simply outside of your control.
Care LESS. . .
about what others think of you. What’s that saying, “other people’s opinion is none of my business”? If you are doing the best that you can then that is what matters. Often our guilt (like mentioned above) is a result of what we think someone is thinking of us.
Take on a “It is what it is” mentality.
Sometimes, just accepting the situation for what it is, is a relief in itself.
Reassess and learn to say no.
Are there things that you can do to eliminate the variables causing you this guilt? Are there times when you should say “no” but you don’t? One thing that I’ve learned(ing) is that you can’t be all things to all people. You also cannot be everywhere at all times, so accept that. My oldest is graduating and it is a huge wakeup call—a reminder that life is short. Life is not slowing down, so, I’ve realized that I need to slow down. . . and enjoy it, soak it in, and be present.
Look at your to-do lists or the requests being made of you.
When you feel overwhelmed and feel as if you are hanging by a thread, picture yourself saying “no”. Is it absolutely critical? Is there a feeling of relief that comes with saying “no”? If so, then perhaps that “no” is needed.
Listen to your heart and make changes if necessary.
Take some time to be still and listen to the calling (sometimes nagging) of your heart. What is it saying? Is there a change that is necessary? Sometimes we have to take a scary leap and make a change. Years ago, I heard someone say, “It’s important that you change when the pain of remaining the same is greater than the pain of the change.”
And, so, I leave you with this thought—what change is less painful than remaining the same?
Because living with guilt? Now that’s painful.